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Ep 14 Average Swingers
Angie and J who describe themselves as "Average Swingers" have pretty much done it all. They recently broke quarantine by attending a sex party where 6 couples all had sex. They talk about how to deal with jealousy and performance issues and...his prosthetic penis.
EP 14 – Average Swingers
Leyna: It's a big week everyone election 2020 coming to a head this week. Although who knows when the official winner of the election will be declared right but I'm thinking, regardless of who it is, all the stuff that we've been seeing on social media, the fighting the, you know this that against that side will continue for quite some time so it is great that we have a program like this Consenting Adults where it doesn't matter what side of the aisle you're on because we're talking about sex. We're talking about love. We're also talking about things like jealousy and performance issues, you know, stuff that we all have to deal with at one time or another, a quick shout out to at FL underscore sauce, Florida sauce, new followers on Twitter welcome today's episode is about a couple whose approach to swinging is. Let's do it. They've kind of tried just about everything, and I believe they're still recovering after breaking quarantine recently by attending a house party where six couples got together, and it was fireworks.
Guest: She starts to come and as soon as she starts to come a guy's wife gets so turned on that she starts to come on his face so I'm watching him, and he's got two girls coming at once and it was just freaking awesome. Get ready. This is Consenting Adults
(Podcast Show Open)
Leyna: My guests today have been married for 27 years, they've been in the lifestyle since 2007 Angie is a 43-year-old healthcare auditor her husband Jay is a 45-year-old factory worker, and they hail from Dallas, Texas. They consider themselves, average swingers. In fact, that's how you can find them on social media, like on Twitter @averageswingers look them up, so you guys is it because you're just your average people who happen to be Swingers, or are you guys like the average swinger?
Guest: Average swingers just became a thing because we weren't the hottest, sexiest, you know, or the ugliest or the richest or the poorest we were just fives across the board, I guess. So we were just average.
Leyna: I just saw on your social media, not more than 20 minutes ago, you guys posted about breaking quarantine to attend a small pool party.
Guest: Yeah. Yeah, I needed a mental break.
Leyna: Can I assume it's a lifestyle pool party?
Guest: Yeah. Oh, yes. Most of the things we do nowadays are only lifestyle.
Leyna: Alright so how was it? I mean this whole COVID thing is really, you know, put the brakes on a lot of lifestyle activities.
Guest: Yeah, well, we hosted a mingler meet and greet every month. So we're used to going and attended stuff constantly with big groups, but I didn't realize how much I was missing that, the social interaction. Right, we've had one or two people here, we haven't done a party or been going out and doing things. We haven't been to a club, but I think yesterday was our first interaction with two people that we had not already seen before.
Guest: What she's saying is we've actually had people come over. Yeah, and we play with them.
Leyna: Right. During the quarantine you're still having lifestyle sex.
Guest: Yes, but only with a select few. Yeah, there's only been two couples that we've done that with, but this is the first time we got out and there was actually I think twelve people there total. So not like huge. Yeah, six couples.
Leyna: Okay, so you've got to explain this pool party to me. Like how does this work? For the person who's never been to a lifestyle pool party, what is it like?
Guest: So you've been to a regular adult-only pool party, correct? So it's essentially the same thing except there's potentially sex involved and nudity. Lots of nudity. They do this once a year. Normally it's a little bigger, but since COVID we sized it down a lot, and everyone just gets there and me and Angie help people get naked. We essentially walk in and drop trou and leave our clothes at the door, you don't generally see us with clothes on again until we leave, and the host the people's houses, they're always naked. Yeah, yeah so I mean, nudity, we make it as comfortable as possible because if you don't feel comfortable, you're not going to have a good time. So we try to make everybody feel as comfortable as they can.
Guest: So, what it is, they all know us, actually I think all of them but one couple had sex with us before. It was just all of them hadn't had sex with each other. Yeah, so they were still feeling each other out.
Leyna: Let's go back to before 2007. Now, had either of you outside of the marriage, been involved in anything like this before?
Guest: No, no, we were married at 16 and 18 so no.
Leyna: Wow and you're still together! Do you think the lifestyle has anything to do with that?
Guest: Absolutely, yes. Because your sexual interests change as you grow up together and we grew up together. So your sexual interests change they don't stay the same, like everything else in your life that evolves. So your sex life does evolve too, it's just that most some people don't evolve together and I think we can use the lifestyle to evolve together. That makes sense? Yeah branching out and exploring.
Leyna: But then how, I mean, how does something like this come up? I mean you were married for quite some time before you threw this into the mix, right?
Guest: Yeah, we were married at 16/18. And our first "play time" with another couple I was 21. So we were five years in before we started having sex with another couple.
Leyna: How did that start?
Guest: Well, first, I don't count that as us being in the lifestyle or swinging.
Guest: Jay is a prude about it. He's a prude about that part of it because it was not networking. He considers once we got into networking, that 2007 when we got on the websites to seek out people that we didn't already know, that's when he considers us starting the lifestyle.
Leyna: As a young couple that you were, might it make sense to separate lifestyle from the fact that you were just young and kind of, you know...
Guest: Curious? I don't know I'm always, I don't know. I don't know how to answer that question. Well, I'm a straightforward person. The only reason this happened was because we only had one set of friends, and we got drunk with them and started playing strip poker and then the strip poker, that always does it, and people generally start with their friends. Having sex with their friends because that's their comfort zone, they won't feel judged by an unknowing, so there's a lot of trust with their friends and most people start having sex with their friends before they dive into lifestyle via social media or websites or whatever.
Leyna: Okay, so you know I'm gonna have to side with Jay on this one. So you were young, you got drunk, playing strip poker. That can't end well or it ends very well and for you two, it ended quite well. You ended up having sex with some friends. How long after that did you then go out and seek the lifestyle?
Guest: It didn't end as well as you think it did. Our very first night was not good, the very first time was not good.
Leyna: Ooh do tell.
Guest: Well, as we didn't talk about any of this beforehand, things just kind of happened. And as it happened, the other guy was having trouble performing and I wasn't. So, all of a sudden this girl's having sex with me and yelling my name and Angie was like, "Nope, I'm out" and just left the room, and then she wasn't in a good mood, so I had to go talk to her and then I had to tell the only friends we have that they needed to leave.
Leyna: Oh no. In hindsight, do you think it would have gone better if you guys would have talked about it or planned it or came up with rules?
Guest: Yeah. I would have procrastinated to the point where I'd be like, "No, we're not going to do this." I would have over thought. I'm an overthinker so I would have overthought everything. I quickly realized that I really like group sex. So, I was the one who started pushing for it after this. Yeah, and it took me like seven years to get her to try it again. Well we moved to different states.
Guest: Yeah well we moved. We lived in Ohio. We moved from Ohio to Texas, in 2002, and then we tried. We went out on a couple of dates, and we ran into some really bad couples, and I told him, I was like, "No, not doing this. Not doing this, I'm done. I don't want to meet."
Leyna: What do you mean by bad?
Guest: They were morally or ethically and/or wrong in height and we know that now, but at the time I was like "If this is what it is, I want nothing to do with it."
Leyna: Can you, can you explain further because I don't understand. I mean, what about them made them bad?
Guest: Once that was doing stuff when their kids were in the other room and the kids could have walked out. Between the ages of two and six. Yeah, so that was like, that's just, yeah. It was oral sex going on where kids were readily available to just walk out whenever they want to and I had an issue with that. And then another. The other one was everything was fine when we first met them, other than their profile being 10 years old, their pictures were 10 years older than what they were. That happens a lot. And the other one was is that his wife felt comfortable with me. So she would call me or text me and tell me all the things that is going wrong in their marriage, and how he's forcing her to do this and do that. We went out with this couple once. Yeah we went out one time and she texted me every day for almost three years.
Leyna: You guys were just looking for some, you know, fun sex on the side. Not a relationship!
Guest: Yeah, right. No, a bad relationship, and not even want to fix anything either, so we were just like, "No, you're too much. You're not what we're looking for, and goodbye" and then it took a long time to get her to stop. Well that was because luckily after those two we stopped. She's like, stop. Yeah, but then we ran into another set of friends in Texas, and one thing led to another, we had sex with them when we were drunk and that was probably three years after. And so we did that, we're like, "Oh this is cool" and we did it more often. We went and got on a website and put a profile up and then did that.
Leyna: Explain to me then after you signed up on this lifestyle website and made a profile, did it take very long to find people that you would be interested in?
Guest: It took, I don't feel like it took that long for me because I didn't do any of it. I don't know how many emails were back and forth. For me I was like, "Oh, we're on the lifestyle or on this website" and then like a week later, "Oh, we're going to dinner with these people," I'm like, "Oh, okay," so for me it was just like, it was like no time at all because I wasn't doing the work but for Jay, I'm sure it was a lifetime.
Guest: Okay, here's the thing about when you first start out and you're on a website. People always make the same mistake, which is what I was doing. You start looking. Well, you look for newer people because you're newer, so you want to find somebody newer too so you guys kind of, like, learn together or have some thing in common, which is ignorance. That's not what you want to do. You want to look at older forever. Yeah you want somebody to guide you, veterans, but you still want to vet them. You don't want to just go with people who give you, "oh we've been in the lifestyle 20 years." Well I would say that, not necessarily want to have sex with them, but you want to go out with those people. So you can talk to them. They know what goes wrong, what happens. We didn't have one of those couples. We call them "Yoda Couples."
Leyna: (Laughs) Okay so, what else did you do wrong? You look for newbies, just like yourself, that was the wrong move. What else did you do wrong?
Guest: Before we started the website, we never used condoms. And we didn't know that that was a thing and that was a necessary thing because we had very high trust with the couples that we were with because we were long term friends, right? So we never used condoms. Now that would not happen. When we started, we didn't have any kind of conversation, we didn't talk about it, we didn't. Then also the first time I had sex with three different women...
Leyna: At the same time?
Guest: Well, sort of, yes. There was like six of us, but I also had a condom, but I didn't switch it when I was going to different girls. Yeah, I mean, that's common sense but I was excited. It's common sense now, but 15 years ago it wasn't. So, we didn't know that that was a thing that you had to do or that had to be expressed or taught. You also should practice with condoms with your partner so you know how to put it on correctly. How to in the dark, figure out which way to roll it forward or backwards. It sounds like it's things that should be common sense but if you've been in a relationship with the same person for a long time there are a lot of things that you do that you wouldn't think of and also when you're first starting out if you haven't used a condom, and say you've been with your partner for like 15 years, you haven't used a condom for 15 years. It takes a little bit of time to stick it on there. Now you're in a pressure situation, and you're trying to figure out how to put a condom on and try to keep hard, and now all of a sudden it's pinched your dick a little bit so there's a whole bunch of stuff that kind of goes mental and you're gonna have performance issues and that's the guy's perspective.
Guest: There's another thing. Everybody has performance issues at some point and, generally every guy.
Leyna: And how do you deal with that?
Guest: I dealt with pills. I took a lot of Viagra and other stuff that helped me stay erect.
Leyna: Right, but, like, let's say you're, you know, on a date, you're in bed, you're naked and you can't perform. How do you deal with it then so that it doesn't become a huge problem? Does everyone else, like, continue without you or what happens?
Guest: Yes, yes, yes. Everybody should continue, and he could apologize. We've had this conversation too. We came up with one apology because you don't want the girl to feel like she's not doing it correctly. So, in order to keep her from having to feel bad about herself the guy was allowed to apologize once and then he can do other things because oral sex is a very big turn on, so he can still do other things that, without his penis, that will help, you know. If you're two couples together, it actually works better if you leave that guy alone and go over and play with the other two.
Leyna: Kind of take the focus off him?
Guest: Yes, instead of two on each bed, maybe have three on one bed while he's just sitting there watching, essentially, live porn. Or his partner can try and come over to help him. Yeah, because usually your partner knows what to do to help get you there. Yeah, there are ways to do it, but it has to come down to situational. It is a very, very common problem. The pool party we were at yesterday, two guys were having issues and these are people that we played with, they played for years. Yeah, and it's just something that happens.
Leyna: How about for women? I mean, do you ever have issues?
Guest: The only issue that I really had is to the point I'm too dry, but I've also had a hysterectomy when I was younger, so that's easily fixed with lube. And the other one is I get worn out really quick, like my vagina doesn't get it. So when I, it's not really performance issues, it's just like, "Okay, I'm done. It hurts. Let's not do this no more but I will give you whatever you need because I don't want any more." Well, the gentleman we were talking about, that she took his pants off as soon as he got in the pool. We tell them we can't go out with them if we have a date on Saturday. Yeah, we can't go out on Friday.
Guest: Cuz he is quite a large gentlemen, so and he is like, if you can imagine, a large appendage and the energizer bunny on full speed. So, that's him and that's all he knows because he, like us, they've been married for forever, and 20 years or 22 years. So that's all she knows and that's all he knows how to do because that's all they've ever done together and even with other people he does the same thing, yeah, and I like it. Yeah, but I literally can't walk for a day after we're done so I'm just like, "Okay, you can't be a Friday night fuck. That's not acceptable."
Guest: Something I always tell women, when a guy has trouble performing, let's keep in mind, men are, we're kind of dogs. We're not like women, we're not going to be so nice that we're going to end up naked with somebody we don't want to have sex with. Women will do that and men won't do that. So if we're naked in a room with you, we want to have sex with you. We're there because we want to have sex with you. It's not you. Women always take that personally. Trust me, it is not the women.
Guest: I think, yeah, because I did it at one point too. Every woman does it where you hit a span in the lifestyle or, or maybe not if you're single and you hit a span of guys that just can't perform you start feeling like "Okay, am I not doing something correctly? Do I need to watch more porn to learn a new technique or is there something that I need to do to change them?" You never need to watch porn to learn this. Some people think that, though. Some people do think that so I'm not saying that I watch it to do it but there's some people who think that. We had a friend a couple years back that we played with several times. This girl was lucky as crap she had like every guy she ever played with, she'd been in the lifestyle about seven years, and she'd never had a guy that had an issue. And then all of a sudden she hit a streak, where there was like seven guys in a row that couldn't perform. So she came to the club and she sought us out to sit down and talk to us about it. And after she talked a little bit she goes, "Now can I borrow Jay, because he's going to be able to perform." And he did it.
Leyna: Because you've been in it for so long now, and you can talk with experience and you have tips and you know what you should have done, what you shouldn't have done. But did you start slow, meaning after you got into it, did you start slow, were there rules like, "No this, no this, no this" and then did the rules come crumbling down at some point?
Guest: Yeah. I don't know about everybody but 90% of couples start with a rules list, a list of things that they are not comfortable with somebody else doing. Mine wasn't initially when we started, but mine was kissing after I had an incident. Yeah, I wasn't really attracted to the guy but the girl was a lot of fun. And since I'm bisexual, I'm like, "Yeah, I'm kind of using the guy to get to the girl," but Jay and the girl were busy so I was just like, "Okay, yeah," so I didn't want to physically kiss him in the mouth but I was doing everything else, and he vocally said something to me during the session, and said, "What you don't want to kiss me? My wife can kiss your husband but you don't want to kiss me?" and then after that I felt so bad. I told Jay, I said, "I'm just not gonna kiss anybody. If anybody asked, I don't kiss." That was the last time we ever played with them. And then I learned that I do like it, but only when I'm ready for it. When I'm attracted. I've learned how to vocalize myself years ago, I didn't know how to say what I wanted or say what I didn't want. So I've learned that.
Leyna: So really the best policy is honesty in the lifestyle.
Guest: Oh absolutely, yes. In any marriage, any relationship, if you can't be 100% honest with your partner, then you can't do it with someone else, because you have got to have everything out on the table, there's no subject that's ever untouchable in a relationship.
Guest: The most common question people ask us is, how do I do this without hurting somebody's feelings? What do you tell somebody when you don't want to have sex with them, or somebody you've already had sex with you don't want to have sex with anymore, or all kinds of stuff. You're gonna hurt somebody's feelings like, yeah, there's no way to do that. You just got to do it, and be honest about it because it's worse to find out, like, you know, a couple weeks later. Oh, she just did it because she felt bad. Regret sex I think is one that we talked about before we regret sex where you did it and you're like yeah I don't really want to do that ever again. We don't ever want to be that couple, we don't want anybody to ever feel like that, so we make sure that we're vocal when we say, "Yeah, I don't really want to do it right now." Or maybe not at all.
Leyna: Were you guys always full swap from the beginning?
Guest: Yes, yeah, yeah. We literally had never actually played with anybody without having penetrative sex with them. There's a couple we knew, we literally made a date with them because we wanted to try self swap. And we knew that they were self swap and the night they showed up, they're like, "We want to try full swap." So I think in all the times we have ever played, it's only been twice. Once it was just the way it worked out. It wasn't a planned thing and the other time it was odd. We met a couple. Their only rule was no oral but it was. I'm telling you right now I'm not that big on oral. I'm a, I'm a sex guy just you know, pound away. But, right. Yeah, it was nothing with your mouth. It was very odd. Just start having sex with somebody, without having some kind of foreplay, making out or whatever it was, it was difficult. All they wanted to do was come in, I was laid on the bed, just start fucking, and I'm like uh...
Leyna: That kind of takes the fun out of it.
Guest: Well, we did it because we were like, "Okay this is different. We generally try something and then we were like, "No, we're never doing that again," or we try it, we're like, "Oh that was different. I kind of like it but let's try it with maybe something else involved."
Leyna: Were there any jealousy issues? I mean you guys have been married. How do you go from sharing your spouse, and not being jealous about anything?
Guest: Oh, you will get jealous, that's an emotion that your body kind of just you have it, you can't hide it so the best thing to do is deal with it. So yes, we have both dealt with that. It's not about not getting jealous. It's about how you deal with it when it happens, you don't attack your partner or anybody else, because you're feeling jealous. That's your emotion, you need to deal with it. Now, you can talk to your partner and have them help you deal with it. But don't blame them for your jealousy. Your jealousy is your jealousy, you need to figure out why it's going on. It's like, if you're sad and you blame somebody else for your sadness.
Leyna: It's doesn't make sense, right.
Guest: I think the other thing is transparency, you're emotionally transparent. Whether it makes sense or not, it just doesn't help the situation at all.
Leyna: But then how do you deal with it in that moment? I mean I understand going home and talking about it and working through issues but in that moment when everyone's naked and having sex, and you're jealous, what do you do?
Guest: You don't deal with it in that moment. If it's really bad, you stop the situation and remove yourselves and say, you know, we need to go. We've always told everybody if something changes in the middle of a play session, and one of you is not comfortable, the other one needs to respect the one that's uncomfortable and leave or excuse themselves from the room if it's a party, just so they can go work it out, or leave. Don't deal with it right there in that moment, don't deal with it with other people around, because it's never gonna work out.
Guest: If I'm literally in the middle of having sex with somebody and Angie taps me and says, "Hey, we need to go." I will. I won't just like walk off but I will tell the person that I'm with "Hey, I'm sorry. Something came up. We literally have to leave. I'm so sorry." And then we'll leave. Don't explain anything in front of other people, don't express any kind of emotion, other than we need to go and take it on your partner's word that you've trusted to have that.
Guest: What some people worry about is, what if they get upset, the people you're with? Like, if somebody you're with gets upset about you guys having to step back and go. Take care of yourselves, evaluate, and they're not somebody you should be having sex with anyways.
Leyna: Angie is bisexual. How about you, Jay?
Guest: No, I'm straight. Although I do want all people to want to have sex with me. So I want bi guys, gay guys, I want everybody just to want to.
Leyna: (Laughs) If you're in play and, and suddenly you find that the other male wants some interaction with Jay. Has that ever happened?
Guest: No, we normally talk about all that before we get that far but someone got close to you one time and you just like said, "No but thank you."
Leyna: So you guys have the OPP? The one penis policy when you're having sex, like, it could be, you know, two women or 10 women but...
Guest: Oh no. I don't think I've ever heard of that, but we were spit roasting Angie yesterday. Yeah.
Leyna: Wait, what was that?
Guest: I said we were spit roasting Angie yesterday. I'm in the pool and Angie's in front of me. Not facing him I'm facing the other direction. Yeah, and the guy across, in front of Angie, I looked at him and I just kind of, I pointed at Angie and I pointed at me and I pointed at him and then I did the universal two fingers together so it looked like the fingers get ready to touch, and I was doing it so it looked like she was in the middle, and he goes, "Okay," shook his head yes. And I had no idea what was going on there. Well soon as he shook his head yes, Angie turned around goes, "What's going on?" We're gonna go spit roast you. She's like, "What?" By the way, spit roasting is, I was in the back of Angie and he was in her mouth.
Guest: I told you it's not a pretty term it's just, it's just a kind of a vulgar dirty term.
Leyna: It's a very male term.
Guest: It is absolutely because you don't generally see women say "Hey I want to be spit roasted today." I said it because it's funny. Yes.
Leyna: Um, okay so in all this time that you guys have been in the lifestyle sounds like you just like having sex with other couples like you just, it sounds like a, like a regular full swap. Mostly.
Guest: We generally don't look for singles. Are you asking about like orgies and stuff?
Leyna: Yeah, I mean anything out of the ordinary.
Guest: Our normal these days. Well, I'm not counting the last six months but our normal in the lifestyle is rarely just one other couple. Let me describe it this way, people try to talk about how many, how many people does it take to make an orgy, right? And everybody has different numbers. I'm here to tell you the number is seven or more.
Guest: That's Jays perspective. No, it's not. Because orgies are special. We have slept with six people many times. It's not special. It's special, it's just not out of the ordinary. It's fun but it's not an orgy, or special.
Leyna: Okay, and how are they special? So once you get seven people...
Guest: I think he's talking about unique because it rarely happens.
Leyna: So then, have you guys been in an orgy?
Guest: Yeah we were yesterday. There was 12 people.
Leyna: Whoa, wait a second.
Guest: There was couples. Yeah, six couples, 12 people.
Leyna: And you're all having sex at the same time, then?
Guest: Pretty much. Well the one guy couldn't perform until the very end, and he was doing oral on another girl so everybody was doing something. If you want to get in depth, I'll tell you what she did yesterday because this was awesome. So, number one, there's this, there's this guy, we've known him for, shit, years and Angie tried to get him to be interested in her a long time ago. Number one, she's horrible at flirting. Yeah I suck at it. And this guy is like a very muscular dude, very fit, very attractive. Yes. But he is such an introvert, it's hard to get a grasp on what he actually wants.
Leyna: An introverted swinger?
Guest: Yeah, there's a lot of them, but his wife is such an extrovert so over the years, they have both just came to the conclusion that regardless of how many times I tell both of them the other one likes them, that they just don't like each other. So he was convinced Angie really didn't like him. I was just trying to make it happen.
Leyna: What are we, in fourth grade? So y'all got this like silent crush on each other
Guest: Kinda, yeah. So yesterday, I walk up to the room and Angie is actually laying on top of another girl, and later kissing on her and everything so I come out and I pump up my dick and start, I'll describe that in a second. Just go with it now for later. So, I pump up my dick and I start having sex with her from behind.
Leyna: Hold on. Do you have a pump in your scrotum?
Guest: Which is why I said I'll describe that in a second.
Leyna: Wow, I thought. I thought it was just a figure of speech.
Guest: No. So, I'm having sex with Angie, while we're watching this other couple on the S chair. And that guy and his wife come in and just sit on the bed, and they're watching us, and he has a raging erection. And he's sitting there, just like watching and stroking. And it's not unusual, or weird, but once again Angie and him have never done anything. No. And I'm sitting there now I'm having sex with Angie and I look over at him I said "Hey, would you like to tag in?" Since Angie hadn't actually said anything. My face was busy. He goes, "Are you sure that's okay?" and I'm like, "It's okay, trust me." And he goes, "I don't..." I just say "Dude just please grab a condom and fuck my wife." Now, I didn't know what I was getting started. Because once he started with Angie, they were having sex for about 30 minutes straight, which is, which is unusual, especially in the group thing. You generally go around and do other things.
Guest: So the really cool part is one point, I tell him, because he has been working really hard just pounding away for a while. I said, "Dude, take a break. Lay down, Angie riding" because I like to watch Angie ride guys because I know how good it feels. So now you're directing. Oh yeah, we do that a lot too, so she starts riding, and then his wife sits on his, his face, so she can kiss Angie while you know she is riding her husband. Angie started to have a really hard orgasm. Normally she's a tough nut to crack. So she's hard to get to come. So she starts to come, and as soon as she starts to come, the guy's wife gets so turned on, she starts to come on his face so I'm watching him, and he's got two girls coming at once and it was just freaking awesome. And then Angie, literally jumped off of him because she was coming so hard she had to stop.
Guest: What do you call it, a catapult? I called it a dismount. Yeah, that's what it was. She jumped off, he jumped off the bed and then you just walked around shaking your hands. Yeah, that shit was starting to get tingling so.
Leyna: So, this was yesterday?
Guest: Yeah it was yesterday. Yeah, I feel like crap. Today we're tired. It's a rare occasion, and I say this emphatically, it's a rare occasion where you could get two couples where all four of them are equally attracted to each other. So for us to get six people, six couples that are all equally attracted to each other, it is extremely, extremely rare. There's no taking one for the team, there's no avoiding this person because you don't want to have sex with them. It was, it's very rare and yeah so we were really excited about our accomplishment yesterday.
Leyna: Wow. How are you guys feeling today?
Guest: We're feeling rough today, we're really tired. We figured out we're not getting any younger and I got random bruises popping up all over my body. So, now to describe the pumping thing I was talking about. I injected Trimix in my penis last year, kind of like for fun at a hotel takeover. Yeah, and it's an erectile dysfunction medicine you inject in the base of your penis.
Guest: Instant hard on. Yeah, gets you really rock hard. Yeah, it's actually medically prescribed but this is one of those things where we knew too many people and someone gave Jay some so he did it. I ended up with a hard-on for over 10 hours. And it swelled up really big at the head after it went down and it turned completely black and blue. What I did is I ended up having like an allergic reaction to the medicine. So I could no longer get a full erection after that. It would only get semi-hard. He busted some veins in it but that was in May of last year. So in August last year at the end of August last year we did one of my birthday pub crawls.
Guest: I was having sex with a girl, and it was completely hard. I came up too far and I broke it in half.
Leyna: Your, your penis?
Guest: Yes, it's called Peyronie's disease. If it doesn't go back straight, it's called Peyronie's disease which is what I had. So it had like a 90 degree bend right at the end of it.
Guest: But then in December. Finally, a doctor just told me I need a prosthetic penis. Yeah, a surgeon. So he has a prosthetic penis, with a pump in his ball sack. They put a pump in my balls.
Leyna: So the actual penis is a prosthetic?
Guest: No the actual penis is actually inside it. There's two veins that generally run the length of the penis. So like, think of a balloon, and then you inflate it and then you deflate it like, what are those, the ones that make clown - balloon animals?
Guest: It gets pumped up with fluid not air. Called E.T. - extra testicle. That's what you call it. So, essentially it looks like I have three testicles, and one of them is just a pump. When I pump it, the reservoir releases the fluid, and pumps it into my penis, gets my penis erect.
Leyna: Okay, then does that fluid then drain back out to the reservoir?
Guest: There's a little button you got to push. Yeah, there's a little button you got to push that releases the liquid nozzle or whatever the hell it is. The valve. That releases the valve, and then I squeeze my dick and all the fluid runs back into the reservoir, pushes it back to the reservoir. Now the bad thing about this is I ended up losing about two inches of length from my penis.
Leyna: Oh, interesting.
Guest: But it now works, so it is now a functioning penis where for eight months it didn't work. It works whenever I want it to for as long as I want it to. Really handy yesterday. Yeah, it was really a day yesterday.
Leyna: When you pump it is it, like, you know, like when a doctor takes your blood pressure pump or is it like...
Guest: Yes. Oh yeah, yes, yes. He has to physically stop what he's doing, and grab his ball sack and start squeezing. No actually I just start pumping it up and it looks, from my point of view, it looks like you're grabbing your ball sack and squeezing so I know what you're doing. That's because when we do it I'm not going down on you, you just watch me as I pump it up. I do watch you. But this, this created a new thing for us because we had to relearn how to have sex again.
Leyna: Physically, for you Angie, does it feel any different.?
Guest: Yes, it does. One it's shorter, and he doesn't have a curve, like he used to have a curve. It's just straight up.
Leyna: They flatten the curve, they flattened the curve. Do you guys see yourself doing this for the rest of your vibrant years?
Guest: Yes I see us doing this for the rest of our lives. Jay sees us doing it in a nursing home, does that help? You gotta understand, nursing homes, since Viagras came out, has been turned into like little orgy Hobbits. And there's a lot more women than there are men. So, yeah, I literally can't wait to get to the nursing home now.
Leyna: I do believe that's AARP, knocking on the door for Jay and Angie, thanks for being on the show you guys what a fun couple, the average swingers are, look them up, on Twitter app, average swingers. Alright, next time on Consenting Adults, a truly open marriage, she does what she pleases. He does what he pleases, and they couldn't be happier.
Guest: She's been with couples. She's been with guys and girls together. We've been in swinging situations. I've had dates on my own. We mentioned once that I did try it with a guy but generally I'm in with women.
Leyna: That's next time on Consenting Adults.
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