Ep 30 Swinging, Married, and Bisexual

​Gary is a bisexual man who started living the lifestyle with his bisexual wife. Both are passionate about bringing bisexuals together and even host a bi-annual resort takeover. From stigmas against bisexual males to orgies with up to 50 people in the playroom, nothing is off-limits in this conversation!

EP 30 – Swinging, Married, and Bisexual
Transcription:
 
0:00
(Sizzle Reel)
Oh yeah I'm bisexual. And so I took that opportunity, I was like oh cool well, me too, you know, and What  what was her response. I'm really into giving and receiving anal. That's, that's, like, almost like fetish level, turn on for me, the vast majority of women I dated were just like, Oh really, tell me more. You know there's guys who just, you know, oral only, there's plenty of them are like yeah but just oral only you know, we're alone, there's just not a combination or anything that anybody's follow have that hasn't been done yet. I mean if you can think of it. If I had to wait at least witness and I probably been part of it. What is the largest group you've been with. There's been a situation where there's probably 30-50 people in the room. Really? Yeah but I mean you can't, you know, possibly reach them all right. You try. I bet you try. You do what you can, you know, I figured, you know, getting head from a guy would be fantastic because they know how the thing works they know how to do it. Well, some of the worst head I've ever had in my life has been from guys. She was on top of the guy. And then I was behind her and so me both us guys were Double Penetrating her. Then there was somebody behind me, penetrating me at the same time, a male, there was a guy behind you, a guy behind me and then another guy behind him, and then another girl behind him with a strap on. This is my last fuck it list item right here. I would like to be topped by a trans girl.
Have you been with them? The opposite where is a woman transitioning to male. In a situation where there's a room full of people and everybody knows that pretty much everybody there's bi. It's crazy. It's off the hook. I mean there's there's, you know, I, you know a lot of me feels bad for the straight people because it's like, you are missing out on, incredible kinky combinations that you're just not going to get, unless everybody’s bi. Get ready. This is Consenting Adults.
 
2:59
Leyna:             My guest today has a very interesting story, Gary, who's 46 in the entertainment industry, his wife is in health care. She's 40. His wife is bisexual, and so was he. In fact, they're so passionate about bringing bisexuals together, they actually do a bi annual resort takeover, please tell me that that was planned.
 
3:27
Guest:             No it's Yeah, I mean, you know, being in the world, apparently bi’s really love their puns so…
 
3:37
Leyna:             I think it was planned, and it works so let's just roll with it. So you you and your wife have been married 10 years but you've been together 14 years. I know that you're very active in the BI, community, and I want to get to that but first let's talk about how this all came about being bisexual is one thing, right. Being swingers and being in the lifestyle is a whole nother thing,
 
4:04
Guest:             Right, and then it's a whole other thing for the male side, there's a serious double standard in the lifestyle.
4:11
Leyna:             Sure, and I've already heard a lot of that with, with the few people that I've talked to, so you've been married 10 years. How long have you been in the lifestyle?
 
4:21
Guest:             10 years. Personally, a lot long 20 years. Oh okay, we had both had experiences in lifestyle, prior to meeting, she mentioned something lifestyle oriented situation, and she  just, you know, yada yada right over it, and she's just like it wasn't even the point of her of her sentence but I'm just like whoa, wait, hold on, let’s back up, you know what, what was that you just said about how you know oh yeah you know, we were having, you know, we had like a, an open situation and there was an oh yeah and I'm bisexual. And so I took that opportunity, I was like oh cool well me too, you know.
Leyna:             What was her response?
Guest:             Once she I mean she's always been pro LGBTQ and she's you know very decidedly an advocate for, for that kind of thing so she was not as stunned as some people could be, I don't think she was expecting it but she just rolled with it.
 
5:20
Leyna:             What has your experience been with other relationships in the past I mean How early do you tell them that you're bisexual.
5:29
Guest:             Well I never even really admitted it. When I was younger, it was, it wasn't like it is now, you know, the younger generation really just accepts any kind of gender fluidity, or sexual fluidity or energy. When I was younger that was not the case and as is now there was even more by eraser and that just, if you wanted to do anything with the same sex you were dead, you know, race, no. There was no there was bisexual so I didn't even admitted to myself until I was probably well into my 20s
 
6:04
Leyna:             Did that affect your relationships, though, I mean so I'm assuming that most of your long term. And when I say long term, you know, in our 20s What does that really mean but for most of your relationships they were with women.
Guest:             Yeah, you just happen to also have sexual relationships with other men, not until way later in life, like a lot of people got started a lot earlier than I did but eventually I did I admitted it to a girl I was in a long term relationship with.
 
6:34
So then I think the first experience was the three so she was okay with it, although she, you know, not not the pro LGBTQ person that my current wife is before I met my current wife when I was in the dating scene, I was, I had already come to terms I've definitely bisexual and all that. And I was like okay, I'm definitely gonna let anyone who I'm dating know, like, pretty soon right off the bat that way. If there's any haters or I could just weed them out immediately, you know, get them off. Get that right off the table and I expected a lot more shock and a lot more. Oh, I want nothing to do with you. But the vast majority of women I dated were just like, Oh really, tell me more.
Leyna:             Interesting     
Guest:             Yeah, they were very fun I was hot.
 
7:31
Leyna:             That's great because I think that it sends a message to and I'm sure that there are so many men out there who are living with this, who aren't able to be as open
 
7:41
Guest:             Right. Oh, and it depends on where in the world you live. Now there are some places where I mean I talked to people in the BI community and online and stuff, who are just like, oh, you couldn't be more in the closet, because in our community. You know, they would be like all that lynched.
 
7:58
Leyna:             Yeah, that’s sad. Okay let's fast forward so you meet this great girl, she's bisexual she's open and a okay with you being bisexual. You both have had lifestyle experience before meeting each other, right, it sounds, it sounds like a great way to start a relationship being that open.
 
8:20
Guest:             You know I don't I don't hear about that as often in our age group anyway.
8:26
Leyna:             Some people would question. If you're in the lifestyle, and also because you're both bisexual like why even get married.
 
8:35
Guest:             For the same reason anybody else would ever get married, really, anybody who would say that would probably be like very have a very narrow view of relationships, maybe in marriage to where it's like, oh well this, you know that they're synonymous with monogamy, which you know is just not everybody's belief really and and, you know, if you look around the world and from culture to culture the you know it, there's, there is a range so you know for anybody to say, you know, why would you get married, it's like oh well, you know, for the same same reasons anybody else gets married, you know …
Leyna:             You loved each other.
Guest:             And, you know, you made a commitment, right, because you're not monogamous doesn’t mean that negates a commitment being in place or the same kind of basic ethical morality except for the fact that, you know it's non monogamy,
 
9:29
Leyna:             So you married each other because you love each other and the things that you do within the lifestyle, are really just sexual activities. Is it just swinging, or is there, is there any polyamory involved in this?
 
9:43
Guest:             For us, It's you know usually just sex but sometimes you need to, like, we'll say another couple when you guys just click. And so we've met some people that we've become close friends with, matter of fact, a lot of people in our bi annual by gathering. There's a lot of like lifelong friendships that have been made there and there's, there's like a sense of community there really is.
 
10:06
Leyna:             Can you talk about the stigma, even in the lifestyle over bi sexual men,
 
10:13
Guest:             I would say things are getting better and better all the time, there is tons of by celebrities and sports people that are now coming out and they're admitting there by males and females. There's bisexual fictional characters in literature on television and movies. So I mean, and like I was saying earlier, the next generation is very okay with gender, sexual fluidity. So, all these things are making it a much better world for the bisexual, male and female. but you're in the past it was so bad to where I remember a forum in like a main forum of a lifestyle site and they would often debate, very much seemed like whether or not the by mail should be allowed to exist, kind of now, and there was just a lot of bio male bashing and it was just horrific and I even like one really bad example. We have swinger friends we call them straight swinging their friends, and they're not by, and we won't play by with them, you know, but we'll play with them and you know there's a lot of people who will also play straight and so this couple anyway said Oh, even if they play straight we wouldn't play with not only would we not play with a bi couple, but we wouldn't play with a couple that played with a couple that played with the Bi couple.  We were like well how many, you know, and then the course the Forum Topic went into, you know, the couple of by people who, who were out about it were like okay so how many people removed does it need to be, and how can you verify this since none of the bad guys back then were even admitting it they were all listed as straight, you know, it's only now that some are finally starting to admit it or maybe be like, well I'm bi comfortable, which means they're bisexual and they're just like that's as far as they can admit
 
12:05
Leyna:             Right, by the way, by the way, can we go through the different because I, so there's bisexual but I hear you know by curious, and then I hear by friendly. I've heard by flexible,
Guest:             Right
Leyna:             So Well, I mean,
Guest:             I've heard hetero flexible
Leyna:             Hetero-flexible,  wow.
Guest:             Always my favorite.
Leyna:             So what are we talking about I am assuming that there's a spectrum,
 
12:32
Guest:             There is and a lot of people don't want the label you know a lot of people oh I like playing with guys but I'm not bisexual. Like okay, whatever you want to call it, you know, I mean a lot of people that like, my wife and I consider ourselves pansexual, actually, which means you know, our ability to to be into somebody or the like or love somebody is not gender specific at all, you know, they could be gender fluid or trans or it doesn't matter, I mean if you click with a person a person's a person and, you know, there you go, it doesn't matter, but a lot of people will use the term bisexuality, there's a lot of people who identify and will say bisexual but really, you know, if you get into with them, they'll be like oh yeah I'm, I'm actually pan, it's just easier to just take the blanket term but there is a ton of different ways that people prefer to identify by comfortable bi friendly.
 
13:26
Leyna:             The reason why I ask is because I do believe there has to be some kind of spectrum and I'm wondering if you know the men who don't want to be called gay because they also are into women, but they're not into all bisexual activities, so they kind of create another category where it's by flexible or by friendly or by curious, whatever, are there men who are bisexual who, for a lack of a better way of putting it, who don't go all the way.
 
13:57
Guest:             Oh yeah, especially in the with by males because of the stigma, a lot of them are like oh I'll do everything but no kissing, you know, definitely don't want to kiss are, you know, they're just, they just like the.
Leyna:             Wait a second it’s the kissing part but they won't do?
Guest:             Yeah, like that's that's too kinky you know.. It's funny. It's funny, but that I mean that that's that's very prevalent there's a lot of guys yes and then, you know there's guys who just, you know, Or are lonely, there's plenty of them are like yeah but just overall you know, are lonely, and that's, that's very prevalent as well everybody you know has their different places where they fall and and and as far as you're talking about the spectrum I mean there's a thing called the Kinsey scale, which I'm sure you've heard about, but if anybody had and it's just basically saying, you know, on one far side of the spectrum, the absolute far, you know, this side would be completely straight have no interest in the same sex anything. And then on the other complete far side of the spectrum would be somebody who has no interest in the opposite sex only just completely gay has no interest in the opposites. And then right smack dab in the middle would be somebody who's completely bisexual. Equally likes males and equally like females but then there's all the areas in between. So somebody may be more gay, but sometimes they like the opposite sex or somebody is mostly straight but sometimes they like to same sex that is just you know it's it's a, it's a spectrum. And, you know, personally, I feel that says depending on my mood or, You know I'm, I could be fall somewhere to the left or right of middle, or in the middle, you know,
 
19:13
Leyna:             Have you heard the term pillow princess?
Guest:             Yes I have. I have indeed.
Leyna:             And what do you understand that term to mean?
Guest:             I've only heard a few times it's what I understand, that's like somebody who will like receive oral and but not return it, but they'll receive oil from the same sex, or whoever and and basically not reciprocate. So right when I hear Pillow princess I think taker. Just like wow yeah you're a taker. All right.
 
19:48
Leyna:             So, um,  is that term used for men as well or is there a term for men who will just receive.
Guest:             I'm not sure I haven't heard it, I haven't heard it used for men, it might be. It might be I mean, I can think of somebody that I would call a pillow Princess a male. Okay so, but there's no shame about it but you know, he gets away with it.
 
Leyna:             So there's there's no term, specifically for men who will only receive bisexual stuff. So you're talking about how the community has become a little more accepting of bisexual males and yet, I believe that there's still this stigma because the different guests that I've talked to, they tell me that even within the lifestyle where it is so much more accepting than the you know, the regular public right, the general public, they still feel like there is a stigma. Regarding bisexual men.
 
20:48
Guest:             There is, there is. It still exists in the lifestyle I was one of those guys for a very long time who listed a straight and just you know, would only admit it, when you know if there was a reason to or an opportunity, perhaps, but when I finally did admit it, like three years ago, I posted on to the swinger sites I've on in the main forums, I posted an article about finally doing it, I'm listing myself as I as by which I actually. And there was mostly just positive reactions go ahead, be yourself, you know, and then there was a lot of people that already knew us and who we had played with in a straightaway, who had no idea that I that I was why I mean I, everybody knew that my wife was. They had no idea and they were just like, oh, I had no idea but yes, you need to be yourself. Be true to yourself. Awesome.
 
21:49
Leyna:             I assume because you've been in the lifestyle for so long, you've probably seen and done a lot of things, yeah.
Guest:             Oh yeah,
Leyna:             I like that answer. You’ve got to tell me more.
 
21:55
Guest:             There's just not a combination or anything that anybody's thought of that hasn't been done yet. I mean if you can think of it. If I hadn't at least witnessed and I probably been part of it, an orgy.
Leyna:             What is the largest group you've been with.
Guest:             There's been a many a situation where there's probably 30 - 50 people in the room.
Leyna:             Really??
Guest:             Yeah but I mean you can't, you know, possibly reach them all right.
Leyna:             But you try I bet you try.
Guest:             You do what you can you know.
 
22:40
Leyna:             What happens in a situation like that, like, you know, I've heard of stories where like, there are six couples and that that's probably the biggest wildest thing that I've heard of so far but when you're talking about a roomful of couples where you're talking
Guest:             When everybody is bisexual too so that makes a big differnce because we've been in some situations where there is a roomful of people we've been to sex clubs there's you know there's there's actual clubs that people go to where there's hundreds of people they dance, and then towards the end of the night, everybody goes off into these play areas, and, and we've been to those where it's like, not specifically bisexual which means you're going to see a lot of by women and you probably will see zero by that, because there is that double standard in the lifestyle where women are expected to be by and men are expected to be straight. So, those, then that's a whole different type of roomful of, you know 20 Something people or 30 Some people or whatever that plays in one way, in a situation where there's a roomful of people and everybody knows that. Pretty much everybody there's bi.
It's crazy.  It's off the hook. I mean there's there's, you know, I, I, you know a lot of me feels bad for the straight people because it's like, well you are missing out on incredible kinky combinations that you're just not going to get, unless everybody’s bi.
 
24:12
Leyna:             Ok, you're gonna have to paint a picture for me. In your situation where there's you know 50 People, and most if not all are bisexual. What are we looking at here.
Guest:             Okay, well, first of all, I mean, anywhere in the lifestyle anybody who, who's getting into any kind of action, or getting, you know, to a situation is always, you know, respectful and they always ask, so there's no the spontaneity factor can only go so far now she played with people poured you guys, you know you have there's a rapport there and you're clearly like each other than me, you know what he wants and lights and all that that it gets it gets a lot quicker but there's still a consent, you know, and everything you know it's polite, you know, touchy, would you like to do this, would you like to do that. But all that aside, somehow it manages to organically, develop, and you know I mean if you've got a bunch of bisexual people you could have. Okay, I'm gonna, I'm thinking of a particular situation. Okay, so there's a guy on the bottom. And then there's a girl on top of him. And then, you've heard of the term DP write double penetration.
Leyna:             Okay wait, hold on, is which way is she facing.
Guest:             Well, in this particular instance, it could be anywhere in this particular instance she was facing down, she was on top with a guy. And then I was behind her and submit both us guys were Double Penetrating her. Then there was somebody behind me, penetrating me at the time,
Leyna:             Okay so a male, there was a guy behind you.
Guest:             A guy behind me and then another guy behind him, and then another girl behind him with a strap on on. Oh, and then another guy behind her. And somebody underneath it was just like, I don't know what they're doing but they were there they were busy. If you could imagine it, Then somebody else has already imagined it and done it. Basically, you know, if they liked it, you know, repeated it.
 
26:25
Leyna:             Boy, you know, for someone who's been in the lifestyle this long, who seen and done all these things you're still very shy about describing the situation.
Guest:             Yeah, I'm a little less shy with people who are clear, you know clearly in the lifestyle and then they're clearly by in our lives, we are not at all out like to friends, family, anybody else. And in the lifestyle you know now I'm just recently out as I.
Leyna:             So then in, your and I'm doing air quotation marks here in your normal life, your friends, family, coworkers, whatever. No one knows.
Guest:             No one, no. It's, I always felt like you know, it's cool, like some people come out and everything and I never say like like, okay, you know, if you're dating the same sex, you know, then you might feel a need to come out, it's more like for me I feel like my wife feels the same way it's more like a need to know basis so it's like, Well, why would friends and family and acquaintances or you know what, why do they need to know what, We're not going to have sex with them so we're working on, you know, for data. But, you know somebody who's a potential target No, I mean, partner.
Leyna:             You mean, you mean like play partner?
Guest:             Yeah, somebody, they need to know that so it's, it's more of an honor. As need to know basis.
 
27:54
Leyna:             Now that you're out as bisexual. Is it always by sexual activity, or is it still just kind of peppered in there with experiences that you have?
Guest:             Well, once I came out it all the people that weren't out of course, they see that you list as bi and then so all the guys that are listing to straight who aren't getting hit up for guy guy activities have wanted but don't want to admit that they want it, they see that you're into it so then all of a sudden now all those people are hitting you up so as soon as I came out yeah the bi activity increase plus, I started groups on the lifestyle sites that are now gotten pretty sizable of just all bi people, it went from being, like you said like peppered in to where now yeah it is more almost mostly all bi people and bi activities.
 
28:45
Leyna:             Let me ask you since you know some of the stories that I'm sure you could tell are really like out there, like for most people, they haven't even seen porn that that's that bad, bad meaning good, Really good bad do you Right.
Guest:             It’s true.
Leyna:             Right. How does just regular sex with your wife at home compare to all this wild stuff that you've done.
 
29:08
Guest:             I mean it's it's it's not the same but I mean, I don't, I don't think I can survive having some of the crazy things that we've done happen too frequently because, I mean, you know, there's a, there's a recovery factor you know especially when it's like a whole weekend fuck fest there's something, five days of, you know the takeover or something, It's just, you can only keep better before you just die of exhaustion, I'm sure.
Leyna:             Like I don't see you, going back to vanilla, ever.
Guest:             No, no, not the No but, I mean when, when it's just me and my wife, then for all intents and  purposes it is a little more, vanilla I mean, but it's still, it's enhanced because we you know we have this, a friend of ours has a whole spiel about why bi couples in the lifestyle are better, it's because they that open communication they have to be in order, especially in this in this world with the stigma against the bi male and everything in order for that to have come out they've had to have had many a conversation that led them to that point of being open and so there's an open line of communication. So our open line of communication what we live with our turn ons, turn off or like a lot of people, even I'm certain of it. A lot of people even to their spouse, they're not letting them really know those secret little kink things that they want to do, and they're embarrassed and, and there's, there's not the same kind of open communication and so I do believe that, you know, in the lifestyle, a lot of couples, their one on ones are enhanced by all their experiences by a by the openness of it all and just being able to communicate and and know what your partner likes wants or, You know, which could which could, you know be. Sometimes I'm feeling more straight than abi and sometimes I'm feeling more gay than straight, or you know or I'm really into giving and receiving anal. That's, that's, like, almost like fetish level turned on for me. But it's not the only thing and it's not required for me to get off which I think is like one of the definitions of a fetish.
 
31:39
Leyna:             Is it different, Whether it's with a man or a woman…for you?
Guest:             Like the actual act? No,  I think that's more on a person to person basis, here's something interesting. Okay, so I always thought, when I was curious about it before I'd ever acted on it I always figured, I have a dick.  so I know how they work, I have the you know the owner's manual. So I figured, you know, getting head from a guy would be fantastic because they know how the thing works they know how to do it. Well, probably the worst head I've ever had in my life has been from guys. So it's just like we you have one of these you know how they were, you know, like how could you be so awful at this you know, so, but I you know I've also had good head from guys but I've had some girls who it's like almost like ideal Are you trans Do you have one of these too cuz you’re really familiar. I mean you really know how to how to deal with those you know,
32:43
Leyna:             So then if I was to ask you if I was to ask you, who's better at oral sex, men or women, there's,
Guest:             It's on an individual. Some people have skills and some people don't and it. Same thing with Jessica, I mean, I see a lifestyle there be like a lot of people are really good at kissing and there's a good amount that are pretty good, but some people are just terrible. It's like, Are you, are you trying to give me a tonsillectomy, what are you actually doing right now. You know it's like oh my god, there's a lot of really, people that are just bad at all kinds of things, insects, you know, in the world, and in the lifestyle, just as you know the demographic would carry over and the ratios, but there's some people who just really know what they're doing, regardless of whether they're a guy girl or trans, you know, it's almost like playing a musical instrument or something like maybe somebody has learned that the technical aspect of it and they can hit the notes outright, but they don't have this flair for it, there's no, there's no art in it there's no soul there's code, you know, and some people when they're having sex, they just,
 
33:50
Leyna:             Well, there has to be more than just going through the motions right, you can tell when someone's just going through the motions. There's kind of like a difference between, like, just eating food and then, like, really enjoying. Right, right, like, really taste it.
Guest:             Yeah, and there are situations where it's like okay, somebody is clearly phoning it in, you know, going through the motions. Are there any fantasies that you have that you haven't done that is a very good question, because that is your litmus test right there. Not too long ago I heard the term, you've heard bucket list right people heard the term bucket list? okay I've heard the term Fuck it list. So, and that is the real litmus test because a lot of people even though I saw they have a pretty good bucket list, right. I have. I couldn't think of maybe one thing that is on my fuck it, list. Now, there's a ton of things that I have tried that were fantastic and I'm, I'm, I'm totally down to go in for a second, or third or fourth or fifth, or what have you, you know, but as far as things that I've never done. This is my last fuck it list item right here. I would like to be topped by a trans girl.
Oh, which happens a lot and we have we know trans and we've been with them and just the opportunity hasn't come up yet. They're I know versatile because if you have the appendage. If you're transgender female or if you're male, there is terminology like what position you play like you know you've probably heard in the gay world you know catcher pitcher, whatever, it's a top, top, bottom and versatile, and a lot of trans girls tend to be bottom, but there are plenty that are top and or verse. And we know, it's just the situation hasn't come about yet so that's my last fuck it list item is to be topped by a trans girl.
 
35:54
Leyna:             Okay, you're gonna have to educate me for a second, and I don't want to offend anyone in the community because, because I don't know it, and I may be using terms that they find offensive alright but for, for people who look for instance who have breasts and a penis. What are they called, are they…
Guest:             That would be a transgender female usually is that, so then it's a male yeah if they have the breasts are probably transitioning or have transitioned, and a lot of times they keep the penis, but not always, you know, there's a full transition you know that they've gone through that whole thing, but, um,
 
36:38
Leyna:             So that's what you're talking about you want to be topped by a trans female so it was a male transitioning to female,
 
Guest:             Or it has transitioned already I mean, it has transitioned to what we know some that are just a couple came to, to a situation where you know one of the, one of the events we were at and, and, until they started walking around the premises naked. They just thought this is a very just a beautiful, you know girl and it's like yes it is it and it is a very beautiful girl she just when she removes her bottoms, she happens to have penis as well, you know,
Leyna:             Have you been with, then the opposite where it's a woman transitioning to male.
 
37:19
Guest:             I haven't personally but I know people who have. And, you know, again, it's just, it all comes down to that all you know and you'll find this a lot, especially in the bisexual community there are those that are actually bisexual but you'll find a lot of them if you really start talking to them they're pan, they're pansexual and it just, it really it's not gender specific in any way, it's like if an individual's hot and they have you have that chemistry with them and you have that rapport, then you know you'll figure it out, sex part.
37:53
Leyna:             So then, so you've got that, that one thing that you haven't done yet. Would that would the answer still be the same than if I asked you, okay COVID is going to be gone. Okay, you get to have whatever you want for this one night. What's the scenario?
Guest:             Any, any number of scenarios that I've actually already been a part of that I'd love to be part of again which is just you know, that group of just really great and fun sexually fluid people. Basically,
38:29
Leyna:             You've been locked on for so long. At this point, you'll do just about anything, just to do it again.
Guest:             Yeah, well, That wasn't Yeah, that is true and that would have been true though at this point pretty much in my life. Yeah, yeah.
38:45
 
Leyna:             Any last words for, and I know that they exist. I know that they exist because I've interviewed some of them who didn't want to go there. Okay. Any last words of advice or encouragement for men who either are curious or who are actually bisexual but who haven't come out, some of them not even to their wife.
 
39:08
Guest:             Oh, I've talked to many of them and, you know, it just, it pains me when I hear somebody say yes I totally would love to be bi and play bi  but my wife would leave me and a lot of times their wife is fully bi, so it's like she's fully allowed to be bisexual. But if he admitted he was he would, you know, that's just my heartbreaks for those people it's like what a terrible predicament. What a terrible situation to be in. But I would say, be true to yourself, and anybody who has that kind of ridiculous thinks that that kind of a double standard is okay, is that really, I mean is that, is that a relationship that's worth saving is that somebody you really want in your life anyway? I would I mean I would personally say, if you're a bisexual male in a situation with a bisexual female and you can’t admist you’re a bisexual male, I would say get that, F out of that situation, because that sounds like a real asshole maneuver it really does, but it's, it's prevalent, and just as a general rule for for all, all areas of life I mean just to be true to yourself and and be who you are. And most of the time that's going to be to your advantage and people around us advantage.
 
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Leyna:             So all you have to do is search for a bisexual group on any of the main websites for swingers and you'll find Gary and his wife, and a ton of other people thinking of different ways they can connect. Next time on Consenting Adults, what's better than a hot wife. Why two, of course.
Guest:             It was a new experience for me it was something that I was interested in. I do like anal play. This is taking it to a whole nother level. It was a lot of sensation going on, and it was pretty overwhelming and it was really amazing. I have to say you know you have nerve endings there. We are happily married women and sex is our hobby.
Leyna:             That's next time, on Consenting Adults.