EP 085 Sleep With My Husband: a Cuckquean's story

​Even more elusive than the unicorn is the cuckquean; the female version of a cuckold. Quean Mo was an insanely jealous person but turned that fire into lust and is happily married as a cuckquean. Is there humiliation in this dynamic as there often is in cuckolding? Is there an equivalent to SPH? (small penis humiliation) Quean Mo wants to be a resource for other cuckqueans and writes a blog you can find at CallOfTheQuean.com. She's also on Twitter @COTQofficial

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Guest 0:44
I've been trying to figure out what it is about jealousy that turns me on and I don't know if there's like a clear answer.

Leyna 0:52
So let's get to it

(Podcast Show Open)

The conversations you're about to hear are intended for mature audiences. If adult themes are offensive to you, well, grow up…
So dirty talk? So sex talk. Yeah, it started off as dirty talk. I was actually like very excited to see my partner with somebody else. She looked at me and said, so you want to have sex with other people.
And you find it a turn on to hear about what he did. Yeah. And then it's like, I want to come home and get it the way she got it. Does he know you have a boyfriend? Yes. This is Consenting Adults with Leyna Nguyen

(End Podcast Show Open)  

Leyna 1:29
My guest today is the beautiful queen mo 30 years old, married to a man who's 38 years old. I am so excited about this interview because I can't tell you how hard I've tried to find a Cuckquean to talk to me. And look although she's way over there in France. So you what you use you were born and raised in Canada. 

Guest 1:54
Yeah, I was born and raised just outside of Toronto. 

Leyna 1:56
All right. There are a lot of swingers in Canada. Hmm. 

Guest 1:59
Yeah, I feel like especially Toronto. It's a pretty liberal city. 

Leyna 2:03
And now you're in France, 

Guest 2:04
And now I'm in France. Yes, in the south of France. 


Leyna 2:05
I’ve got so many questions for you can't wait. So you're a cuckquean. For those who don't know, can you basically explain what that is? 

Guest 2:17
Yeah, cuckquean is the female version of a cuckold. So basically, it's an individual who enjoys watching or knowing about their partner having affairs, doing air quotes because it's, it's at the knowledge and the consent of that partner. 

Leyna 2:33
Okay, now when did you realize that you were into this? 

Guest 2:36
Oh my gosh, it's so funny because even as a teenager I had like little like hints of it, but unfortunately because I wasn't in the right relationships and ever, like, fully came out. And in 2017 is when I moved to France with my French husband. We were living in Canada prior. We went to a strip joint together in Portugal and watching him watching the women I was like, Oh, this is interesting. Something.
And then it just kind of grew and became more apparent to me what was happening. And that was before I actually knew what a cuckquean was. Knowing that actually came later, but that's when like the initial kind of spark happened. Yeah, 

Leyna 3:14
So before this though, we're either you or your husband, like into lifestyle? 

Guest 3:19
Honestly, no, we we enjoyed sex clubs. We like we like to adult spaces because Toronto has still to this day our favorite sex club. There's no obligation to swing that's not what the club is specifically about. It's kind of for everybody with every desire fetish, whatever. And so other than that, I was actually a really, really jealous partner at the beginning of our relationship like hugely 

Leyna 3:44
Oh, that’s interesting. Because it'd be just the opposite, right? Yeah. Yeah. This explains something that I've always wondered for you to be a cuckquean. I would think that you have to get off on the jealousy. 

Guest 3:56
Yeah. And eventually, it turned into that, but it definitely took some work. And I do believe for me, specifically, the jealousy that happened at the beginning of our relationship. It was it was really like it was intense. For me it was baggage from previous relationship. And luckily I was able to work through it. And now that yeah, the jealousy is part of the turn on, which for some people who can't understand that I know sounds so weird, but it's actually really, I mean, it's exciting. It's really exciting. 

Leyna 4:25
I imagine is like the fire of jealousy but positive, right? It's because really, jealousy is one of the most intense emotions anyone can feel right? 

Guest 4:35
Yeah, it can be really, really hard. Absolutely. And for me, I've been trying to figure out what it is about jealousy that turns me on. And I don't know if there's like a clear answer, but because my husband and I have such so much trust. We speak of like everything's on the table. It's been that way since day one. The fear and the reason for jealousy, the the fear of being replaced or betrayed or all of this. I can sit in it without actually the fear of it actually happening because I trust him if that makes sense. So I can enjoy the jealousy for what it is without actually dealing with the real fear of the potential betrayal or being replaced. 

Leyna 5:15
Now do you know other women who are like you?

Guest 5:19
I’ve never actually met them in person, but I've had so many people reach out to me because as I'm learning, there's not, as you've said at the beginning, it's hard to find cuckqueans and I don't think there's a lot of information out there yet. I've met women that are open, I've went I've met Swingers, I've met women that when I tell them I'm a cuckquean, they're like, Oh, I could be interested in that. That sounds hot, but to actually call themselves a cuckquean or had done it. No, I've never I haven't met anybody yet. 

Leyna 5:44
Okay, so so far, we've just been thrown out a lot of words and description. Let's talk about what you actually enjoy. Well, given the whys, let's hear it. Okay, just in more light. 

Guest 5:59
Okay, this is a big one. I would consider myself a voyeur. Cuckqueans come in so many different like shapes and forms and colors. And, for example, I'm someone who likes to see my husband have sex with other people. And also if because of COVID and we haven't had been able to meet other people. We haven't been able to go to clubs, I haven't been able to socialize, except for online. When we do have sex, even just him telling me stories from previous experiences he's had with previous partners can be hugely a turn on. I have a very vivid imagination.

Unknown 6:35
And I'm very visual. So those two things combined I can be Yeah, it can it can work for me. Of course the the ideal situation is to find partners who are they complement us like the cuckcake. I don't know if you've heard of the word cuckcake. I don't know if anybody if your listeners for the word cuckcake, but it's basically the compatible partner in the income cuckquean dynamic. It's It's the third it's the the mistress if you want to call her.

Leyna 7:00
So that can that be then also the unicorn that Everyone's searching for? 

Guest 7:06
Yes, exactly. Yes. 

Leyna 7:07
Okay. So then let me ask you this because I mean, they say that unicorns are hard to find. Cuckqueans I think are even harder to find. Yeah. What makes you a cuckcake versus just a unicorn hooking up with a couple? 

Guest 7:23
For me, I think it depends on the person how they identify or what they consider themselves. Also as a Cuckquean if I bring in a third and it's specifically to watch them with my husband, I would consider them a cuckcake. Also, a lot of the time from women that I've spoken to online or even just like learning about the cuck dynamic, there is oftentimes an element of humiliation involved. Where the cuckcake or the bull in a cuckold dynamic the person who's having sex with the husband or wife, they are trying to humiliate the cuckquean or the cuckold. 

Leyna 7:59
Okay, I was just gonna say is the cuckcake the female bull? Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Right. Okay. And then very often, bulls are dominant. Yes. So are cuckqueans normally dominant? 

Guest 8:15
Cuckqueans are cuckcakes? Oh my god. They're so close.

Leyna 8:19
Cuckquean No, our cuckcakes. Yeah, normally dominant?


Guest 8:25
I think in a lot of in a lot of dynamics. Yes, I do think that that's like the traditional role. But again, like I said, everyone's different. I personally, this is where we kind of get interesting and between my husband and I, we were BDSM practitioners. I'm submissive, he's dominant. I when a woman comes in can be as more switch. But I don't like being humiliated by the cuckcake. My husband James is the dom and then the cuckcake and I are kind of on like the same level regarding submission. So I think it really depends on what the people are looking for. But yeah, there have been women for example, I had one woman reach out to me, and she's very fit. And she's just like, I love being a cuckcake and making the cuckquean feel like she's less attractive than I am and like, humiliated her and that way. I was like, this is interesting. I'm not into it. Sorry, but I wish you luck for finding that person. Yeah. 

Leyna 9:21
Okay, so like everything there's a spectrum. Yeah, just like with a cuckold. Same thing with you, where there may be cuckqueans who are into the humiliation in fact, we we talked to one and she likes being told things for instance, like she's tighter than you are or whatever it is, and she gets off on it. Yeah. 

Guest 9:46
I find that so interesting. And I think that that's great. I think like for me I just sex is a spectrum and even within those specific kinks or fetishes, it's a spectrum and it's yeah it's really cool 

Leyna 9:55
And I would imagine just like anything when you first get into it you think you might like this and then as you grow right then you really start, your freak flag really starts flying. 

Guest 10:06
Oh yeah, for sure. Oh my gosh, my sexuality has developed I learned even just through like because the cuckquean, the cuckquean fantasy for me, it was like a gateway. It was like a gateway kink. It opened my eyes. It opened my world to so many other things. Because when you're searching for that one thing, for example, going to adult spaces. Now with that new mindset, it's like oh, what else can we do? And and I do think that the cuckquean in me it's it is just a portion of my sexuality. It's not the whole thing where I do think that there are some people were there very much exclusively that 

Leyna 10:40
Okay, can you describe your first real queen experience?

Guest 10:48
Yeah, for sure. it was in Rennes, France. This is like a very, it's student oriented, like there's a huge young crowd like it's very like university students. We were walking down the street, there's a table of it like 10 to 12 young people and they called us over so we sat and throughout the night, it's interesting because I never actually spoke to her. But I saw my husband speaking to her and watching them interact and seeing that they actually got along really well. I was like, okay, and then of course, I was having drinks so got like, a little looser. I could see that she started becoming interested in me as well. And we went to to a club and I got her a drink, and then I actually ended up kissing her. And then she's like, 

Leyna 11:37
Have you had experiences with women before? 

Guest 11:38
Um, before her Not really. I always was interested. And I'm more like vibes over genitals. Like if I feel a connection with you, and I know that we're vibing in that way, like, it's great.

Leyna 11:48
Well, we're not talking like the other vibes. Yeah.

Guest 11:54
And so we went back to her place. At first I think that she wanted me to join in because I kissed her but then we all spoke about it and she was totally interested in I just remember sitting back and watching watching him go down on her watching him play with her body and then eventually, fucking her and I was like, okay, so this is what this feels like. And when we speak about jealousy, this was intense jealousy, but intense pleasure at the same time. Like I don't even know how to describe that Milange or that concoction, but it was really, really exciting and I think I mean, it felt like the whole it was it took hours, but I think everything just went in slow motion and it was it was freaking awesome. 

Leyna 12:45
Were you so you were aroused? I was super aroused. Yeah, but you didn't have a desire to jump in. 

Guest 12:51
I did a little bit but I think that the the pleasure watching was just kind of overtook that. It's like watching I don't even know how to explain it's like watching a movie. Like I was so taken that I just didn't I just kind of sat there was like, Okay, 

Leyna 13:03
How much of that do you think was you trying to like watch and remember everything because you know, you're going to go back and withdrawn this right. 

Guest 13:12
Oh, for sure. It's going in the spank bank.Take this with me. When I got some time alone. Yeah. Uh huh. 

Leyna 13:19
Okay, so after they have sex, what is that moment like when you're done? Like when they're done? It was it awkward?

Guest 13:28
So after it was done, we'd already had so many conversations leading up to it. And that's when I got in bed with them and lied with them. And it was I was actually between both of them and she I think I was almost her after care. So she she like kind of like leaned into me. I was her comfort in that moment, I guess more than than he was. And that was her choice. That was totally her choice. And, and we saw her the next day at the same place. And she had told everybody that she had an amazing time so we were like, Okay, we did well, this is nice. Yeah. So it was it was it was a good first experience. I think that communication really helped. 

What was it like being with your husband after this happened? Honestly, I spent I think 48 hours in a panic attack.

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Leyna 14:21
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Guest 16:18
oh because I I think it was all the messaging I'd we received like monogamy and and infidelity. And so I think all of a sudden I had this like unconscious bubbling of all these things, telling me that what we did was wrong. There was a there was shame. I wasn't mad at him. It was almost like I was mad at myself for letting it happen. But then we sat and we talked about it. I'm a writer, so I journaled it out like I just kind of went through the process of really trying to define what it was. And I think that it was just a matter of me working through all these preconceived ideas that I'd absorbed and after the 48 hours of anxiety, it was great 

Leyna 16:58
Was your husband at all kind of trepidatious about okay, she says she wants this but how

Guest 17:07
especially having dealt with me at the beginning of our relationship and I'm talking like the level of jealousy that I was that green monster Oh, I was I was horrible, like at times and he will today be like if you could speak to the Quean, MO You were then she'd be like, who are you? And so yeah, when I told him for the first time I want you to have sex with another woman. He was like, okay, yeah, not happening. What are you trying to do to us like, and and yeah, it's interesting because that's I don't know if that's a conversation that a lot of people have, again, the information about cuckqueaning is minimal. But then for the partner, and them having a resource to figure it out is even even less. And so it's been interesting speaking to because yeah, he struggled hard, hard and it just took a lot and a lot of communication. Many arguments you guys survived Yeah, we were really strong we were really good foundation and I think we go at it like we're on the same team and and we don't want to harm the relationship. If at any point it's going to cause any rift between like we stop and I think that's also been a really good understanding from the from the beginning. Is that this can stop at any time. 

Leyna 18:21
Have you ever taken breaks? 

Guest 18:22
Absolutely. And I mean, COVID helps. But But yeah, there were moments between that first time and then like the time after that, where I was like, I can't do this, like I'm I just can't and there were moments where he would try to do a lot of research on it. And then I'd be like, this is becoming your fantasy. It's not even my fantasy anymore. So it's a learning curve. Like it's just lots and lots of trial and error. 

Leyna 18:47
Now, I also know that you what is it that you call yourself? Are you a sex traveler? 

Guest 18:52
I call myself a sexy traveler because I tried using the word ethical sex tourism, but sex tourism has a lot of connotations . Yes, yes. And which I completely understand. So I call us sexy travelers, because we love traveling just generally but seeing adult spaces around the world is one of our favorite things. It's not like I'm top priority. 

Leyna 19:18
Okay, and you got to explain what you actually do. 

Guest 19:23
So we traveled to different countries to experience the most prestigious and luxurious sex clubs within that country. Somehow we both found each other on that and that's what we love. We've been to Toronto, we've been to Portugal. We've been to Prague recently, France, and hopefully, I mean, now that everything's kind of opening back up hopefully we'll go to more places but we don't go into them thinking that we're going to hook up we really just like passing the night if but if something happens, something happens. You always have different people, different crowds, different, I don't know, desires, and it's just really interesting. Meeting people and being able to speak about that. And then if something fun happens, that's a whole bonus. 

Leyna 20:00
When you as a couple go into a sex club, you'll be in a cuckquean. Yeah. I wonder if it's easier for you to find some action versus a cuckold relationship. Or, or actually, maybe not. 

Guest 20:14
If I'm being honest, we actually have never done in a sex club. We've never fulfilled that fantasy in a sex club. But regarding that, I always think that it's easier for women to find sexual experiences. So for example, I think this is just be totally your theorizing. But I think men don't have as much to risk in a lot of ways. So women, women are more guarded sexually and men are way more open for the sexual experiences. So I would assume that as a hot wife, which would be the wife of a cuckold, actually, she could maybe find it more easily than me because my husband would be the one actually having sex with the woman. Does that make sense? Oh, really? 

Leyna 20:54
Yeah. It's like, like even like vanilla sex. Same thing. There's a reason why it's right. 

Guest 21:00
I don't know if you've experienced sex clubs or not.

Leyna 21:02
I haven't people keep on telling me there. You've got to go and check them out. 

Guest 21:08
If you're ever in Toronto, look up the Oasis Aqua lounge. It is phenomenal. And it's also a day spa like you don't go in feeling like and they have really strict rules about like, people can't even look at you for a long period of time. Or they can get kicked out like they're really really hardcore, but making sure people are comfortable. So I'll start there.

Leyna 21:24
Have you been to any sex clubs in the United States that you like? 

Guest 21:28
Yeah, so we lived in Georgia for a year actually. And we went to the Trapeze and that is a swingers club and the good thing about that is when you enter the club, it's really like, the nightclub. It's the dance floor. It's it's they have this beautiful buffet. You can spend your entire night there and you wouldn't even know it's a sex club, except maybe some people are wearing less clothing than you would at a regular nightclub. But then when you go there, it could be la Cinco de Mayo. I've never been to LA I need to I'm sure you guys have amazing sex clubs there, I'm sure but 

Leyna 22:01
I don't know. But what I'm finding out is that there are sex clubs like everywhere. You could be in the middle of nowhere and there's probably a sex club close by. Absolutely. Yeah, it's really amazing. 

Guest 22:12
It’s because it's a hidden community but man they are alive and well and they are going strong.

Leyna 22:17
I you know sometimes when I post first of all, thank you so much for doing this on video and for being this open because most of my guests can't be open right? Yeah. And I see my guests faces. My listeners don't right. And there's still there's still a lot of people who don't believe that swingers could be attractive people. 

Guest 22:42
Yeah, it's an it's unfortunate. People really have a narrow view. of most unconventional lifestyles, people are practitioners. Because it's so not the case. 

Leyna 22:54
Okay, so we've talked about your first experience. Fast forward, you know, till when you're a little bit more experienced in this realm, like yes, what have you done, but look at that smile on your face.

Guest 23:07
Great memories. We met a woman at it's they're called it's called a tng party, which is called the next generation and it's the next generation of BDSM practitioners or people in the lifestyle. So these are people between 18 years old and 30 years old, and there's this one woman that we'll call her Shelly, we met Shelly and she was one of the most open forward like people but her sexuality and her attraction to us. She was also a submissive. She wanted to be submissive to both of us. And so that was the first experience that I've had as a cuckquean, watching my husband dominate another woman. Hmm. And so that was interesting. And that was really cool. And I actually I'm gonna sound like a crazy person, but I was I was tied to the chair. Because I was like, we're both missing this time at the chair. I'll be forced to, you know, and I remember laughing because I was so happy in that moment. 


Leyna 24:10
I’m like that too. 

Guest 24:11
I was like, What is going on? This is not an appropriate time to be laughing but they were so into their world. They didn't even notice.

Leyna 24:19
You've got to tell me what happened. 

Guest 24:23
Oh, gosh. So it started with karaoke, which is hilarious. And then we were drinking together and then we went back to the apartment and she basically just said, I'm I'm yours if you guys want me and that kind of like handing over or like submission for my husband is like the top like, melting. So he told us both to go into the bedroom. He told us to remove our clothes. And put collars on. He stayed out and when he was ready, he came in and he had I believe, a leash a whip. And just his black pants and black shoes, and he fasten these to the chair. He told me that I needed to stay there and watch them. And then he he told her told Shelly, to call him sir. And gave her orders and yeah, actually 

Leyna 25:26
No, no, no, no, no What orders? Yeah, what was he? Was he telling her to do things? 

Guest 25:34
Yeah, like to go on her knees and undo his pants and then to get on the bed to go on all fours. And then he had sex with her in that position and doggy style. Eventually though, in this situation. He did untie me and I did join in but it was like a good 20 minutes before that. And so I had, I had the full show, and it was really, really exciting. 

Leyna 25:56
Do you like anything now that you didn't think you'd like? 

Guest 25:59
Oh, wow. Yeah, I think I'm more a little more dominant than I thought that I'd ever be. Oh, like I really at the beginning was like fully submissive and really thought that I would be submissive even even with women. But once there's another woman in the room, I really, definitely a little more dominant, whatever be 


Leyna 26:20
Okay, so that means some so that means like, like telling her what to do. To your husband or Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And isn't always just three people. 

Guest 26:29
We have had experiences with others but it wasn't so much the cuckquean dynamic that's just been group sex or Oh, just just group sex, you know, no big deal. Or this is the thing and this is why I said like the cuckquean part of me isn't the whole part because we're really just, we're very free and as long as we meet the right people, anything can happen. 

Leyna 26:51
Let’s go back to to kind of your role when there's when there's a play session, okay. Okay, so you've never been penetrated by another man. But let's say so it's you, your husband and the other woman. Yes. So are you sometimes told to do stuff to that woman by your husband? Are you directed to do stuff at all? 

Guest 27:13
I if I agree to it before because there are some women that I don't want to be involved. But yes, so with the with Shelly, the second woman in New York, eventually there were a few orders. It was more orders for her to do stuff to me, to be honest. So at some point, she went down on me. And I think that yeah, that was the extent of how much I was really involved with her. But yes, and I do think in the future, there will be more orders.

Leyna 27:44
Are you looking forward to these orders? Of course, just hearing the order does being told to do something to another woman by your husband. turn you on? Yes, it does. I think that hearing the order for them to do something to him is more of a turn on. Do you have any fantasies that you? I mean, what's so much oh my gosh, how would you feel watching your husband would like a bunch of women at this time? 

Guest 28:14
Oh man we’ve spoken about this. But I like this is like with full Queenmo part coming out. I picture me sitting in like a fuckin throne and like overseeing it, and there's like 10 women and he's just doing his thing. And some are like masks and then just be sitting there watching. Oh, yeah, I'm a freak about masks about costumes but roleplay like if it was Halloween every day of the year, I don't I get into some trouble.



Leyna 28:41
Let's say that there are people who maybe think they might be a cuckquean. Because you know how like the thought might be kind of exciting and interesting. Of course, do you have any words of wisdom before they jump in? 

Guest 28:56
Yes to things always go as slow as the slower partner do not rush and also experiment slowly. And what I mean by that what James and I did at the beginning is people watch. Talk about who you find attractive. Let your partner whoever the if you're the cuck, let your partner tell you who they find attractive and pay attention how you feel. Have a porn date. watch porn together. Go online together doing those few things and just paying attention how you feel? Yeah, I think that that's at least to start the best way forward. That's what we did and it worked.

Leyna 29:32
And you can follow her adventures at Callofthequean.com that’s spelled QUAN she's also on Twitter @COTQofficial.

Leyna 29:45
Next time on consenting adults of Vietnamese vixen has herself an Asian Cuck. 

Guest 29:51
It turned out to be a highly embarrassing thing for me too, because I actually came before he did. So were you masturbating while you were watching? I was told not to. And like I felt that you touch yourself. I did Leyna.

Leyna 30:12
That’s next time on Consenting Adults