HOSTED BY LEYNA NGUYEN
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Dear Leyna

How do I find Women to Sleep with My Husband?

11/18/2021

1 Comment

 
Dear Leyna,
I love your show.  Like everything you do—it’s with humor and class and positivity! To that end, I saw that you have an advice section and I’d love to put this out there. (Plz don’t show my name though) I see a lot about men watching their wives. I’m the opposite. I love watching my husband—at least I want to watch. I’ve brought it up but he doesn’t seem interested which seems so weird, most men would jump at the opportunity. I’d be good with getting him a prostitute even. How else can I “get him there?” AND where can I find women willing to sleep with my husband so I can watch? I don’t hear much of that talked about. Is this a “thing” and how do we find someone? We both have jobs that would be in jeopardy if this came to light. How do we not get burned? Thank you so much for all you do!
​Rachel

Dear Rachel,
Thanks for the kind words. As we know, there's a spectrum. You don't have to like humiliation or degradation to be a cuckquean and really, not much sounds weird to me anymore.  I spoke to someone about your question and she said something that makes a lot of sense: "Search it in porn and if not much comes up, it's rare."  So although your desires, playstyle, kink may be rare, it's not weird. :-) I'm still looking for other cuckqueans to interview.  Here is the one I did talk to, and please read on to see what our listeners have to say.
Love,
Leyna


From Twitter @HedonistMidwest
Wow I would think there would be plenty of women out there that would be interested.  Talk between yourselves on what you both want, and keep looking and you will find her!

FromTwitter @MrsZyzzx
Well I was having a discussion about this yesterday! I pick from closer contacts over strangers, but we have gone that route as well. The Quean I spoke to prefers http://Fetlife.com . I trust my friends, and one time, a co-worker, to not spill the beans.

From Twitter @Hotwife463
It’s not as common but there are women out there that really enjoy seeing their man be their own personal porn star. I’d give the same advice to her as I would to a Cuckold couple. Put the information out there, clearly state why you’re into this & how you hope it will enhance your relationship. And then give them time to process. Don’t push. Be patient. Talk talk talk. This lifestyle will be here when you are ready. As far as finding people, swinger dating sites are a good place to start. Be honest about what you’re looking for and try to connect with people as individuals rather than breathing sex dolls to fulfill a fantasy. Good luck! #cuckoldingislove #ethicalnonmonogamy
From Twitter @Letmeplzurwife
There are a couple of sub Reddit’s for #Cuckqueans that offer lifestyle advice and support. I’ll bet her husband thinks it’s a trap. Communicate!!!

From Twitter @Vej1965
The Cuckqueen is a rare creature.  I suggest she sit down and honestly explain to hubby why the thought of him serving another women would be such a turn on and enhance the marriage.....Honesty is critical to her success  in getting hubby to play.

From Twitter EExploress
Quite rare, it's normally the men that like to watch but I just witnessed exactly this at a sex party at the weekend. First question is, is he in to any form of ethical non monogamy at all - especially full swap? If he is, get to a sex club, it will happen eventually.

From Twitter @BenBDSM
He is a man & as a man, he wants to sleep with outer women, but it's not worth it. If after the wife comes down from cloud 9 how she will react. 
Do you love her, you seemed to be into her etc You need to promise him that you will take full responsibility for your after feelings.

From Twitter @MistressKye
While it isn't that common that women want to watch their gents w/ other women, there are indeed some of us. I enjoy it from time to time as well. For me, it's a nice reprieve because as a female dominant I'm usually the one 'doing' to others. I think my most important piece of advice for her would be to make sure she is absolutely positive that she is 100% comfortable with this. As I've said previously, the fantasy is often more powerful than the reality. And this is something you can't take back. For most women, we have been so deeply conditioned to monogamy that watching our guy with another woman stirs up feelings of jealousy and instigates our insecurities. Worse, feelings of betrayal although we are the ones who ask for it. This is an incredibly slippery slope. This is probably part of the reason why her guy might be feeling & expressing "no way." Which didn't surprise me. Yes, many men would love the opportunity to be with another woman w/ the blessing of their spouse or committed partner. However, they know on the back end there's the potential for all those things I mentioned above. Which is a Pandora's box of destruction for many couples if it is not handled and executed correctly. She's off to a great start because she has expressed her interest to him. The next step would be to ask him why he said "no thanks." This will foster a conversation that could be the early stages of a very long conversation that should occur before executing this experience. As with the other person I replied to prior, you should not be trying to "get them" to do anything. That type of pushing is agenda-driven and often leads to consent and boundary breeches. Which will inevitably peck away at trust. IF after many many conversations both parties agree, a set of rules and boundaries should be established that they create together. If they get to this point, I would suggest joining a swing lifestyle website like SLS where you are more likely to find women who are versed in this type of intimacy and familiar with marriage and committed relationship dynamics when engaging with other partners. The members on these websites are often living an alternative lifestyle and are respective of not 'outing' others in the community. Lastly, I'd like to reiterate that if this is not part of your normal intimacy, or you are not already involved in alternative lifestyle community, you should very much proceed with caution when asking your man to be intimate with another woman. It's sort of sneaky where although you thought you wanted this, you get these covert feelings of betrayal. Best wishes to her and kudos for getting in touch with her non-traditional enter stirrings :-). Warm Regards, Kye
1 Comment
Stan
7/14/2022 01:21:11 pm

There are several well thought out answers but all miss the key point, your husband is not keen on the idea. You REALLY need to talk to him to see if he would only do it to please you but not comfortable actually participating. How much do you share your deepest dreams and desires, have you gotten any positive feedback supporting your fantasy? He might go along with it for all the wrong reasons and resent the pressure to perform when his views are not being taken seriously..
You should be expressing your interests and see if he volunteers to see it through to please you as HIS idea as a gift for you. Possibly invite him to a sex club just as observers to see if both are interested in looking deeper into the life style. If both of you gravitate to the same positive conclusion of it being a positive addition to your relationship, go ahead, but if either of you are pressuring the other outside of their comfort zone, it could be a lot worse than you just not getting your fantasy fulfilled.
My GF years ago brought home her friend with the idea of a 3some, when I was not ready for that and we had not discussed it before they were sitting nude in the hot tub with a pitcher of frozen Margaritas, when I arrived home and it was uncomfortable as if I was a trained seal performing on command. The other girl was older, less in shape and not attractive to my taste. I tried to cooperate but resented it for a while, until we broke up I was not opposed to the idea in general because I did like woman a lot, but was picky.
Without 100% mutual interest in your situation, I would pass on it entirely, until you both, after full agreement, decide individually that both are ready for it. How would you feel if he promised his buddy he could have his way with you? you already have your answer, he is not keen on the idea.

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