My wife and I have really enjoyed your podcasts. I’m pretty sure we have been listening since day 1 when the first couple was looking to adopt a pet and found a sex club and joined the lifestyle! That was hilarious. Since then there have been many hot topics. Anyway, I’m writing because I was hoping to get some input into something. My wife and I are still relative newbies in the lifestyle. We started with girl girl soft swap, to foursome soft swaps, to full swap. Recently we had an experience with a single male where we ended up “crossing swords” There was touching, fondling and eventually I gave him a blow job. In a million years I never would have bet that could ever happen. But it did, and I actually enjoyed it. I’ve always been straight. I didn’t know what that meant. My wife found it to be a huge turn on to watch, but I don’t know what to think. I don’t think this makes me bi, or gay, it was just an act during a hot sex session. I don’t find men attractive, I don’t have any emotional ties to what went down (pun intended), to me it was all in fun, a chance to push some boundaries. So in the lifestyle you are basically required to label your sexual preferences. I need some input here. Does giving another man oral once make me “bisexual”, “bi-comfortable” “Gay” or “Open minded”? Would I do it again? I think if the energy was there like it was that night I would. And is it weird I would consider putting a cock in my mouth, but the thought of kissing another man on the lips is a no go? Someone help me sort this out.
Thanks Leyna ,
Richard from Rancho Cucamonga
I've had a lot of conversation with guests on this very subject lately and the responses cover the spectrum. Gary from epidsode 30, who is bisexual seems to think people who participate in bisexuality but don't identify as such are just uncomfortable with the label but are indeed bi. But then there are guests who say they enjoy the activity IN THE MOMENT if the situation is just right--but they don't feel bisexual. And while some people are fine not having to categorize it, there are people who struggle with it and to them--it IS important to put a label on it. Read on to see some of the responses we got to your question on Twitter.
From Twitter @hotwife463
This is extremely common! @castawaySOS has coined the term #cocksexual as a way to describe men who are comfortable w/some aspects bi-play. I think the majority of people have some fluidity to their sexuality. Most women are okay exploring above the waist/most guys are ok below.
From Twitter @the_hopefulcuck
I tell people that I’m bisexual, but hetero-romantic. I can have sex with anyone. I can only fall in love with women.
From Twitter @JM1Random
Go with whatever term you like. Bi-situational might work - ie you’re bi, to a degree, in certain situations.
Don’t sweat it. Women in the lifestyle don’t worry when they first have some sexual contact with a woman, so why should we?
From Twitter @Life_of_Eros
Congratulations on allowing yourself to experience a new avenue of pleasure. Your “safest” label is open minded which is what more ppl in the lifestyle should try.
From Twitter @JonnyAce
I think it’s important to remember that we each get to decide our own sexuality, and one instance of a sexual act certainly doesn’t define your sexuality.
The advice given comes from people's personal experiences, and while some may have certifications or other training, none of the content should be considered medical or otherwise professional advice. This page is for your reading pleasure and should be considered for entertainment purposes only. Questions can be submitted via our contact page or social media. Feel free to comment if you have advice.